Mercy, not sacrifice…

I have this thought running through my mind as I can’t sleep at the moment… I used to have this feeling that worship songs should have been sung personally, to God. For example, instead of “How He Loves” we should sing “How You Love.”

Until I fully understood the sincerity of heart thing; the surrender that comes with a sincerity of heart. That it wasn’t about the song, per se… It’s not as though I wouldn’t be equally as flattered if my fiance sang to me, “sugar pie honey bunch, you know that I love YOU,” or “I’ve got sunshine on a cloudy day with MY GIRL.” I’d be flushed either way, especially knowing he means it.

And that’s why God repeatedly said in both the Old Testament and New that He was yearning for a “circumcised heart,” not necessarily the literal cut in the flesh. Not the burnt offerings or fancy holidays. He wanted sincerity of heart, even if we presented to Him stick-figure, scribbled drawings… Even if we sang off key… Even if we danced with two left feet…

You can try following all the rules, keeping your heart in a box, unsurrendered… Or you can be a “Spiritual House” … A “living sacrifice” … A CHILD of God… Not a rule-following, judgmental, condemning, graceless person… Because God desires MERCY, not SACRIFICE. He doesn’t need our sacrifice, but He’ll use it when we offer ourselves to love for loves-sake… He desires the sincere heart that says, “yes, Lord, here I am, send me…” To love the orphans and widows that often don’t look like what you expect… To clothe the poor and feed the hungry… To be love, life, and light in a dark, hopeless, empty, and broken world…

Schooling is not going to teach you love.
Theology and linguistics in Greek and Hebrew will not teach you love.
Putting your pastor and other leaders on a pedestal won’t teach you love (also, this is often idolatry).

LOVE, HIMSELF (because God is Love) — can teach you love. And it’s not a pointing fingers, put people in a box kind of love. It’s a love that loved the whole world (even the parts that didn’t love Him). So much so, that He sacrificed Himself even though He did nothing wrong and we constantly do… A love that laid down His life for us messy people…

If you’re putting someone down instead of speaking life and helping to guide, that’s not love. If you’re focused on everything wrong instead of what’s amazingly beautiful, that’s not love. If you believe someone can’t change, that’s not love. If you’re angry, living a perfect looking social media presence but hateful, mocking, judging, and gossiping behind closed doors… That’s not love… Stop claiming you love your spouses, posting lies about how they’re your bestie, and then talk about divorce when no one is looking… Stop telling your kids they have to be perfect when no one is perfect… Stop pushing yourselves like you can work off your issues…

We have GOT to stop faking it and let our weaknesses showcase His strengths… it goes for me included…

And no amount of rule-following or looking picture perfect can save us… Except for, and praise God for this, HIS GRACE that none of us deserve but all of us can have… If we choose…

And these are my thoughts tonight… Because I don’t care how I feel… I love you all… Because I love Him… Because He loves me…

And yes, I’ll use an endless amount of scripture to show it because it’s literally all over the Bible (and to think the following aren’t even close to ALL of them). God just wants us to give Him a chance, and He’s worth it… Because He gives us a countless amount… 🙏💞🙌

#endrant

Matthew 23:8-11
But you are not to be called rabbi, for you have one teacher, and you are all brothers. And call no man your father on earth, for you have one Father, who is in heaven. Neither be called instructors, for you have one instructor, the Christ. The greatest among you shall be your servant.

Hosea 6:6
For I desire steadfast love and not sacrifice, the knowledge of God rather than burnt offerings.

Ephesians 2:8-9
For by grace you have been saved through faith. And this is not your own doing; it is the gift of God, not a result of works, so that no one may boast.

Romans 11:6
But if it is by grace, it is no longer on the basis of works; otherwise grace would no longer be grace.

2 Corinthians 12:9
But he said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.” Therefore I will boast all the more gladly of my weaknesses, so that the power of Christ may rest upon me.

Deuteronomy 30:6
And the Lord your God will circumcise your heart and the heart of your offspring, so that you will love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul, that you may live.

Romans 2:29
But a Jew is one inwardly, and circumcision is a matter of the heart, by the Spirit, not by the letter. His praise is not from man but from God.

Jeremiah 4:4
Circumcise yourselves to the Lord; remove the foreskin of your hearts, O men of Judah and inhabitants of Jerusalem; lest my wrath go forth like fire, and burn with none to quench it, because of the evil of your deeds.

Galatians 5:6
For in Christ Jesus neither circumcision nor uncircumcision counts for anything, but only faith working through love.

Galatians 6:15
For neither circumcision counts for anything, nor uncircumcision, but a new creation.

Jeremiah 9:25
Behold, the days are coming, declares the Lord, when I will punish all those who are circumcised merely in the flesh

Jeremiah 6:10
To whom shall I speak and give warning, that they may hear? Behold, their ears are uncircumcised, they cannot listen; behold, the word of the Lord is to them an object of scorn; they take no pleasure in it.

Colossians 3:11
Here there is not Greek and Jew, circumcised and uncircumcised, barbarian, Scythian, slave, free; but Christ is all, and in all.

1 Corinthians 4:5
Therefore do not pronounce judgment before the time, before the Lord comes, who will bring to light the things now hidden in darkness and will disclose the purposes of the heart. Then each one will receive his commendation from God.

Info

There was a time in my life I'd questioned why I could be good at many things, but none of it was deemed useful. I slaved away, day by day, at a normal job that only used a small percentage of all I was capable of. I'd wanted so badly to be valued, seen, and loved, but I barely loved myself enough to let others in. Being in the background was a safe haven and being invisible was survival. At a certain point, I'd worked myself to a point of exhaustion -- not just from labor, but from life itself. Struggling to understand myself, searching for love in all the wrong places, and continuing to allow life to beat me down, I'd become ready to quit. Life was no longer appealing. Death was inviting. The only God I'd understood for the bulk of my life was a God of judgment and wrath and a world of religions that started wars, division, and hatred. Prior to 2014, I was an atheist who quickly dismissed anyone for believing in God. In my former opinion, God was just a glorified, adult-accepted imaginary friend. How could there be a God who’d let so much evil exist? I faced nearly every form of abuse: physical, emotional, sexual, and spiritual. I've been homeless, beaten, molested, and raped. Up until High School, I'd moved every 6-months to a year to an entirely new environment. I'd grown up as the dirty, smelling poor kid who just moved into town. I had grown so accustomed to living life on my own, coping however I saw fit and surviving… I was not looking for God. Instead, I was looking for love from people, substance-induced courage, and adapting whoever I could become to be deemed valuable. In 2014 I was sick, utterly broken, and exhausted from trying so hard to fit into a world I could never fit into. The life I'd built crashed and burned before my eyes and as a last resort effort to save myself from suicide, I moved to Visalia, CA. In what seemed like the thinnest, nearly invisible thread of hope possible, I met God. I was incredibly hesitant to believe in an omniscient, supernatural God. I picked apart the Bible with every question I could, asking why I should believe in silly stories like Noah's Ark and people resurrecting from the dead. By the time I'd read through Matthew, Genesis, Exodus, and the story of King David, only one conclusion came to me... This book is the greatest book I'd ever read. Like much of the world's entertainment, it was fueled with tragedy and triumph. I wasn't as concerned with God's wrath but littered throughout the entire book I saw human imperfection. Time and time again people made mistake after mistake, but in the end, God gave Jesus to atone for every single mistake. God's mercy became this big, beautiful opportunity--a light in a very dark place. Suddenly, all of my mistakes didn't matter. I learned about repentance in that it's not just a quick, "I'm sorry..." and then I continue to make the same mistake without worry. Repentance, being birthed in conviction, became a, "I don't want to be this person anymore..." and it drove me to become what Christians call, "a new creation." But this was just the beginning of my walk, and as it turns out, this cycle of learning, growing, making a mistake, feeling convicted, falling into repentance, and learning again... It's nearly never-ending. Looking back on my childhood, as alone as I believed I was, God was always whispering to me. My life has changed drastically and there’s no going back. I've been a missionary who lived on faith alone, traveled the world, experienced God on many levels, and changed from Atheist to radical for the love of Jesus. Today, I lead an all-girls youth Bible study group: teaching girls the love of God, their identity in God, and how to cope with a broken world. As a worship leader, I encourage spirit-led worship and unashamed love for the Father, fostering and welcoming His Presence for others to encounter Him, and surrendering as a living sacrifice to let Him move and speak through me -- teaching others that we lead by example. God's given me the opportunity to speak, sing, and minister all over the world. I've also had the honor of serving other local ministries/churches by helping to build a brand, websites, and singing wherever I am called to lead in worship. All I desire is that others may see the God I see. Even amid my storms, I am filled with hope. I look back on my life and realize life is truly so much easier, regardless of the trials I come across because I have a God to trust and rely on. He is faithful and has never let me fall too hard that I couldn't get back up. Everything in my life is a testimony and can be used to shed light on just how good of a God He is. Today, not one of my gifts goes unused. Everything I have ever been good at has become something of value to help others. So, I'm doing everything I do because I never thought I could; never believed I was valuable and worthy enough. I'm doing this because He tells me I am His, and as His, I hope to spread His heart wherever He calls me to. Romans 12:1-2 is what I live for, “Therefore, I urge you, brothers and sisters, in view of God’s mercy, to offer your bodies as a living sacrifice, holy and pleasing to God—this is your true and proper worship. Do not conform to the pattern of this world but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. Then you will be able to test and approve what God’s will is—his good, pleasing and perfect will.”

Author archive Author website

September 4, 2022

jesus

Christian, compassion, empathy, Faith, god, grace, hope, jesus, life, Lord, love, Redeemer, religion, Savior

Rescued Hope

He reached down from heaven and rescued me; he drew me out of deep waters. Psalm 18:16